20th August 2007

This has taken me a while to write up, but I know you will want this as part of the diary especially. So go get yourself a cup of tea and some biscuits cause it's a long entry today.

How I met your mother.

I was at one High School up to Year 11. That year Mum pushed for me to take accounting and economics classes as the hope was that I would take over Grandpas stationary business (yeah right!!). So half way through that year it was fairly obvious that I was not made for this sort of thing. Firstly I didn't have the best work ethic and secondly, me and numbers…….well we just don't get along. So there were meetings and discussions and arguments over my future. It was clear that music was my real love. So they did some research and discovered a music college and thought it something reputable for me to head towards. I have always found it strange considering Mum was in bands herself that she would feel it necessary to try and turn my love into a reputable and snobby endeavour. I had shown no interest in classical music let alone classical guitar. This line of logic was however ignored and it was decided for me that I would start taking classical guitar lessons and aim towards getting in to this college (which I did!). I left school half way through and spent the next 6 months getting lessons in prac and theory with the aim of moving schools and repeating Year 11 with a more music focus. There were a few positives to this. Firstly I was much younger than anyone else im my year so by staying back it meant that I was much closer in age to everyone else. Secondly it gave me a chance to start a new school as a new person. Nobody knew me and therefore I could be whoever I wanted. The six months flew by and I did learn a lot of stuff (most of it gone now). I entered your Secondary College with a fresh outlook and my shy past was left behind me. I was baggage free. This time it was music classes and drama that took precedence. I did a hell of a lot of growing, and living over the next year, met some new hippy friends and had a fantastic year of hanging out on the oval with my guitar, smoking beedies (indian cigarettes). I found myself comfortably fitting into all the various groups of that year thanks to my new attitude and the classes I took. I hung out with the music kids, the drama kids and the popular kids just as easily as my closer stoner friends! Yes, I didn't mind the odd choof here and there. But then I don't have an addictive personality so the danger was low for me. Plus trying something harder was not even an option in my mind. I did better in class as well. But it was Year 12 that was my best year. Everything came together for me and I had the time of my young life. All of a sudden (especially after my first kiss that school holidays) I began to get the attention of the ladies, quite a lot of attention actually. I had taken to wearing that lucky suede jacket to school. I wore a t-shirt under my unbuttoned school shirt that was quite punky and wore doc martins. I had suddenly become cool. I wanted to look like Judd Nelson in Breakfast Club, my favourite movie. My hair was getting long and the pimples had gone. I was also quite thin, it wasn't from a healthy lifestyle though, I did no exercise, I just stopped eating . Really really stupid but the more attention I got the less I ate. I lived on noodles, REM and beedies. Life was sweet.

If you go and get Linda Goodmans 'Love Signs' (I highly recommend you do if you want to know the best signs to partner up with) and read up on Cancer with Scorpio, there is a section which mentions the most likely places these two will meet up. They were a library or a history class. So year 12 had begun and I was off to my first Australian History class with Mr Ricardo, a fantastic young teacher who even invited us all to his place for a talk on Aboriginal culture. It was in History class that I first noticed your Mother. I can’t remember what I said but I know it was something to make her laugh. She was hanging out with the popular group, some of who I knew through Drama class. I do recall thinking she was cute as; however it was not as simple as love at first site with us. I was simply not mature enough to understand what love was all about, I wouldn't have known love if it was wearing a t-shirt and waving a big flag with my heart on it. And guess where we had our first conversation? Yep, the library. Weird huh? The twist to the beginning of our friendship was that I was actually attempting to hook Chas up with her. I guess it was because they were both in art classes together and I hadn't really started to see us as being the types to get together. Your Mum will be able to tell you however that she had actually told Christine about me. She said that she had met this cute boy at school who reminded her of Timothy Hutton (she also tells me she remembers I said something strange to her about the school work. She says she also remembers clearly my jacket and docs, see I told you!). We started to hang out quite a lot, myself, Chas, Shane, Aeda and Lee would go over to her house across the street from school and hang out playing pool and smoking. Once I got my license in June we would drive down to the mall and hang out there in the food court. We were all very arty types who listened to REM and The Pixies and talked about life and the future. We did not involve ourselves in school activities at all, but we were not depressed and cynical at all. We were a very happy and deep group. During this time I had my first girlfriend. Her name was Charlene and she was very cool. I remember noticing her for the first time when she showed up to class with the coolest haircut. It went from 80's long blow dried bouffant to number 1 clipper around the sides and long spiky up top. She was a big Cure fan and she looked like nobody else in the school, hence my interest! I can’t help but seeking out the different ones. Then we went on a drama trip to the city to watch Les Miserables (the BEST) and I remember I was sitting up the back (obviously) and she got on the bus. As she was walking down the aisle our eyes met and zap, there was this connection established that wasn't there before. Very strange. So we hung out a lot that day and after that as well. Then one night I went to a party with her and we went out for a walk. I can’t begin to tell you how nervous I was. We went and sat down under some trees and finally after some time I asked if she wanted to go out with me. I reckon it took about half an hour or more before she finally said yes, I couldn't work out what was making her question it so much (little did I know she was actually gay but still fighting it). Finally she said yes and I leant over to kiss her and we butted teeth, was that ever an omen. We lasted about 8 weeks I think and I really didn't see her that much (didn't have my license yet) and I think we pashed about three times. The rest of the time was the hand holding and stuff at school. It was very cute and I had never got to experience that innocent kind of school relationship before. She soon broke up with me, I can’t remember what she said. I wasn't hurt and we remained good friends still. It was also at this time that I started to notice your Mum. I remember my first phone call to her. You may find this incredibly daft but I liked saying stuff to give the impression that I was able to read peoples minds. I would hazard comments that guess at their feelings on certain things and I would often be spot on. It added to my air of mystery and intelligence (boys, I know!). There was a bunch of us going to a party during that time and I was living far away still. The problem was my Mum was going out and wouldn't be able to take me down there unless she took me early. So I called your Mum up and when she answered I said, without saying who I was mind you, "why don't you like your name"? She was like "what?”. If you read books on meeting friends and influencing people they will say that you should open with something people will remember. I think this did exactly that. She then admitted that she never liked the surname Baker because of the teasing she got. Hey it wasn't exactly a risky guess I know but hey, we were young! I told her that I needed to come down early and could I hang out at her place. Charlene was going to still be at work as a receptionist at a dentist. She said that was fine and so I arrived at about 5 hours before the party was to start. We hung out in her bedroom and I immediately went to her record collection and proceeded to bag the crap out of it. It was truly awful. Lots of bad hair Heavy Metal Glam bands, ouch. This girl had a lot to learn. I still remember being there and had finally begun to notice her in a big way. She was hot. I was also a terrible flirt and charming her to within an inch of her life. So it really wasn't that long after I broke up with Charlene that we started to hang out more. I don't recall we did much hanging out alone together. We went to blues gigs and around this time she was going out with this knob head friend of her brothers. I remember being furious about that. Then a bit later after she broke up with him, I got invited to hang out with her and her brother’s friends at their local pub. Her parents said I could sleep over in the living room because we would be back late. Her brother picked us up and off we went to the pub. At this stage I was a big fan of black and tan beer (half stout half lager). I used to go down to my friend Shane's house quite often and we would go to the Hotel and sit there drinking and sometimes doing homework or whatever. Anyway we shared a jug or two and had a dance and got quite drunk. By the time her brother got us back in the car and he was driving us back home we were laughing so much that he ended up pulling over and telling us to get the hell out. We were only a couple of km’s away from her home so we did! Halfway back to her house, walking through the half lit meandering streets I grabbed her and kissed her for the first time. After a while we kept walking and talking again and I think despite the excitement we were both eager to get some sleep. The next morning we were both up fairly early and I guess your grandparents where still asleep. It was at this point that the famous coffee mug incident occurred. She made us both a cup of coffee and some toast. While your Mum was buttering the bread I was quietly sipping at the coffee and I noticed that the words 'I love you Mum' were written across the side of the mug. I assumed it must have been a gift for mother’s day or something. I then had a funny idea, the same type of idea that makes me mess with people’s minds like I said before. So I carefully placed my hand strategically over the word 'Mum' so it just said 'I love you' and held it out to your Mother and said "hey". She turned to me, saw the mug, saw me nodding and raising my eyebrows sarcastically and then just went back to buttering the bread. It was not until later that I realised I made a bad move. She took it seriously and thought I was getting all heavy on her. I guess she was still learning about me at that stage. So things eased off after that for some time. I'm not sure when your Mum made it clear that she was not looking for a relationship during the busy Year 12 as she wanted to focus on study. I believe it was after this and possibly on the night we were at a Hotel (pubs again!). I took her off to one side and formally asked her if she wanted to go out and she shot me down in flames. I was not expecting that answer, I guess my ego had gotten a bit bigger at this stage. We did kiss a couple of times more during that Year however. I did kiss other girls too, especially at the local nightclub. I guess at this stage it was more like we got together if we couldn't find anyone else. It really was a weird old relationship. The next big change occurred after the school year was over. From what your Mum tells me she was starting to think about me more and I think she was looking to get together with me eventually. Her plans were perhaps pushed along somewhat when she was speaking to one of our friends Lyn who was Charlene's best friend. I had kissed her once before. We were all off to a party and Lyn was talking to your Mum and saying that she was thinking of making a move on me that night. Well what followed was a perfect example of how devious and conniving women can be, because the idea that I would be off kissing someone else was enough for your Mother to go into action mode. She called me up and invited me over to say hi before I went to Charlene's place. She could not make it as it was her brother’s birthday that night. We went off to the milk bar and I could tell something was up. She seemed distracted and nervous. By the time we got back there was only time for a quick cold drink and a smoke (well that's youth for you, we all smoked). We stood outside in the garden and talked about nothing in particular until her Father called out to say it was time to go. The next bit came as a complete surprise. One minute I was chatting away about nothing and then all of a sudden this strange expression came over her and she fixed me with smouldering eyes that were so intense I stopped talking. She then took a step towards me, grabbed me by the jacket and said in a quiet voice "come here". Next thing I knew I was being kissed like I was never kissed before. My hands were still hanging limply to the sides. I was in complete shock. Then she pulled away from me, smiled and said "I have to go now, have a nice night". And off she went leaving me to walk over to Charlene's house shaking all over. I told the girls what had happened and their reaction confused the hell out of me. They were furious. Of course I didn't know that Lyn had spoken to your Mum about me so I wasn't to know your mum essentially buttered someone else's bread. Your Mum can certainly be ruthless and she certainly played quite a chess game that day. Check mate!

From that point on we were together, inseparable……well almost! More about that another time.